Wednesday, August 10, 2011

I am lost.....can someone, anyone....find me?

I cannot speak, I cannot write. I don't know what's wrong. 

I am not sad, nor depressed. The words just won't come.

I had a revelation, a few weeks ago, that changed my sense of self worth.

I am changed, fundamentally, and yet, I can not write about it.

The words simply won't come.

I often write about my feelings, and yet these feelings have no words.

My perceptions are different, yet I can not find the words to describe it.

What is this then, this lack of verbal expression?

Nothing is wrong, yet everything seems odd.

I am at a standstill, yet moving fast.

There is chaos, deep, yet it has order.

I am at peace, yet a great battle rages.

This sensation is calm, yet overwhelming.

I know myself, but I am so far away.

I feel like a hero, but I am searching, longing, for a hero myself.

I wait, patiently, yet my patience is gone.

My focus is clear, yet the window is foggy.

I am more than I ever was before, yet there is a great emptiness.

I see two worlds, but I am not present in either.

Someone, somewhere, can see me, can feel me, I know they are there.

Where am I? Where is my soul?

I want to return, I want to live, to feel, to have my voice heard.

Where am I? 

Someone.......please......find me......bring me home.........

1 comment:

  1. Many of us go through that experience as we struggle to break out of our cocoons. The act of pushing against the walls strengthens our wings to fly. This is a time to keep pushing, keep going.. hang in there and know you will feel whole again.. your voice will return, and you will know what to say.. still your struggle to speak and know.. that's what you're being asked to do.. listen.. there's a message. You're already home. Hang in there and you'll be so glad you did!