Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Another date tomorrow.....and lessons learned

Hello folks, how's it going today?

I've got another date tomorrow. I'm really looking forward to seeing her again, we're going to walk around in the local mall, just be together, and talk. It never occurred to me before how long it takes to really get to know someone. But then again, I've never really dated before, so it's all pretty new lol.

One thing I know for sure. We are both taking things very slowly. I think it's the best way to go about it, especially since what both of us have been through in our lives. Relationships, romantic ones in particular, are all unique, because every person is unique. No one relationship is like any other, and when the right person comes along, even if you "know" right away that they are the "One", it still takes time to learn who that person really is, and whether or not you match up well. I've had a few relationships that on the surface seemed wonderful, we had a lot of the same likes and dislikes, we had a great rapport, but, in the end, there was always something missing. That something was the love of who the person really was on the inside, past all the superficial things, and none of those relationships lasted more than a few months. So, I changed my strategy, and now I strive to get to know the person for who they are, before I go nuts over them because of things that in reality don't make for a relationship.

First that means starting out as friends. That's what she and I are now, mainly just friends, but there is a real sense that we can and will be something more as our relationship progresses, we have a goal of sorts, but we are not forcing anything, we're taking it nice and slow, and seeing if we "gel". I like that.

We'll talk a lot tomorrow, find out more about each other, and who knows? Maybe we'll find out we like each other all the more.

In other news, I learned a lesson of sorts in the last few days. A lesson in timing, and dealing with new challenges. I had this idea that coming down here would make my life so easy, and that I would not have any more challenges to overcome. Not everyday life challenges mind you, with things that involve making a living, and how things happen when you start a new life in a new state. No, what I'm talking about are challenges of a more personal nature. 

I thought that being here, and having the freedom to be myself, that I would no longer have any challenges to overcome in my growth as a human being. I again foolishly believed I had "arrived" at the destination, I believed life would no longer have anything to teach me about myself, and what improvements I could make to make me a better person. I was wrong.

While I would rather not share the details of the lesson I am currently learning, suffice it to say that I know this is a challenge I was meant to experience at this time in my life. The particular circumstances could not have been arranged at an earlier point, nor could they have taught me this lesson at a later point in my life. Now is the time. It is an intensely personal thing for me, and no one can help me to overcome it but myself. No one else in my position would see it the same as I, so therefore it would not be the same challenge. 

Even talking to someone else about it would not provide any real insight, as their perceptions of the situation would be their own, and not mine, and while I may be able to glean something from any advice they may give, ultimately I still have only myself to answer to for how I choose to deal with it. So I have chosen to keep it to myself, and deal with it in my own way. I only mention it here because it is what is currently going on in my life.

Having said that, life in general is better than I could have imagined. I'm settling in well here with Bella and Jack, and I am very happy. I got a library card today, and I'm looking forward to getting back to reading more often. It's been years since I read on a regular basis. 

So that's what's going on today, I'm about to head to bed, I'm getting tired, and I want to be up early to get ready for my date! Have a great night folks, talk to you soon!

1 comment:

  1. Wow.. you have a lot going on right now! I love your introspection and focus on growing into the best you can be. Hang in there!